Changes

As I'm writing this, I'm at the verandah of my house breathing in the fresh air and enjoying the chilly rainy season. Gosh I think the weather has gone bonkers, coz it will be raining for 10-15 minutes and then the sun starts to shine again. 

As I sit here just enjoying the sound of birds chirping and the soothing sound of our little waterfalls, I got lost in my own gaze and many things are running through my head. 

It's good to be back home for good. I grew up in this house, this is where I belong, but believe me being away from home for too long makes me rather unfamiliar with the setting of my very own home. I need to keep asking the other family members for things. 

 

"ma, where do you put this?" 

"which switch is for which?"

Same thing happened when I go out. Despite me being someone that mom described as ''tak boleh duduk rumah'', always up for something somewhere with someone, being away from the country for too long makes me a bit awkward and clueless as for where are the right and "in" places to dine-in, the newest coolest places to hang out and I even got lost in my own hometown, Shah Alam. That pretty much conclude how much things have changed while I was away. 

That's not all. Being away from home for too long, I came back home only to realize that my parents don't look as healthy and fit as they were when they sent me off 5 years ago. Parents are really ageing and it's just a matter of time when we (the children) have play the role of taking care that our parents once did for us. This time, it's our time to return their favour, it's our time to take care of them. 

I went off when I was 20, I came back just recently, and I am now 25. Spent half of my 20s abroad, I must say I missed a lot of important events and truth to be told, my absence do break apart the friendship I had with some friends. It's nobody's fault, it's just that not everybody is able to cope with distance and after years of being away, somehow you just don't click anymore. It's sad but life goes on.

That is one thing I regret about being abroad. I love keeping friends, and I can fairly say I'm good at it but the distance and the long years I was away failed me this time. 

To look at things positively, I told myself that this is just us growing up. Sometimes, growing up really means growing apart. So this is me growing up, abroad and away from family and best friends, and now I'm back to my hometown, and ready to rock and roll! (in the hospital, as a busy junior doctor -____-")