3rd year of MBBS and still struggling.

i shouldn't be blogging at this crucial moment, but i guess a few minutes won't hurt hehe ;p

i am not yet gila, but i am starting to freak out about the upcoming exam, both my 3rd internal assessment examination and my final professional exam.

here's the suckest part of everything ;
- we don't have study leave for 3rd IA at all.
- the gap between 3rd IA and final exam is only 10 days (omg 10 days for study leave for final, bangangkah anda?)
- 2-3 days before 3rd IA, we are expected to come for orthopaedics end-posting test (argh, get lost!)
- not much gap between the subjects seriously! cth : monday pharmac I, tuesday pharmac II, wednesday microb I, thurs microb II, friday forensic. (mcm haram tak??)

eiiii bila list down baru rasa nak mencarut. ape lah bangang bodoh bengap sangat jadual? and what the heck we really do need study leave okay!! uni lain study leave siap sebulan kotttt, kitorang punya study leave haram tkde! fuck!

and what the heck time tu la jugak nak buat end-posting test for orthopaedics?! dahla kalau mmg nak score test ortho u have to revise anatomy gila2 balik. excuse me, abis bila masa aku nak bace patho pharmac microb and forensic for my final ha tahiiii?????????????

and what the fuck exam tkde gap between subjects? kau igt lepas balik jawab paper pharmac aku sampai umah terus nak bukak buku for tomorrow's paper ke? kau pikir kau tak nampak otak tu berpeluh busuk2 semua maknanya otak aku tak penat? ape ke bangang sgt? kau igt tu paper kacang goreng macam jawab upsr ke? kau igt tu paper macam jawab soalan masa dekat BTN ke? ehh, sumpah otak lembu ok sebab tak fikir semua tu.

igt kitorang tanak score ke for final and 3rd IA? tapi kalau jadual sikit punya babi mcm tu, satu haram pun tak supportive, study leave pun ciput, siap ade exam ortho lagi, ape kes dol?!

tak cukup2 stress dengan semua name drugs yg annoying, lepas tu patho nak tau all the minute mechanism blablabla, dengan nak tau satu kerabat bacteria virus cacing2 kulat2 semua, kau nak kasi stress pulak dengan all these things. eiii, i wish i have a single word yg boleh describe kebangangan kebodohan kebabian ahh those words are just not enough because argh. ok sabar ira.

i need all the strength and all the hard work and all the prayers in the world. this is very important to me and my friends. please let me pass all the 4 subjects because i swear i want to serve you ppl as a doctor.

cewah, but really. i do love medicine but sometimes i just can't handle the burden. orang lain belajar medic ada je cuti sampai 2-3 bulan, kitorang? haram. setahun cuti 6 minggu. mcm cilaks kan? and my everyday still saling tak tumpah mcm zaman sekolah. class starts at 830am, then finishes at 430pm. unlike orang lain, hari ni ada class, tomorrow takde, lusa takde, ah heaven ok.

so btw, now i tgh posting orthopaedics. anything and everything related to bones. well, not really into it, or maybe not yet? and bila masuk OT, pergh, sumpah tak tipu, terus reject ortho, i won't specialize in ortho, ape lagi nak jadi surgeon. penat nak mati. dahla kena pakai the mask all the time to maintain absolute aseptic condition. with my history of low blood pressure etc etc, sumpah boleh buat drama student pengsan dlm OT. keluar OT terus janji dekat diri sendiri, kau tak payah nak gedik2 jadi surgeon.

yeah, my mom pon tak advise jadi surgeon. ahh mmg tak ah. i still stick of O&G, orrrr, mcm nak medicine tapi argghhh takyah la i think medicine is too much. by that time i want to concentrate on my family blablabla ceh konon but seriously wehhhh, adakah aku akan belajar and stay nerdy sampai tua??? no wayyyy! arrgghhh Nadd, i know u feel me!!! (ni lagi sorang, a straight A's student who wanted to do fashion but stucked with medicine! she said her parents boleh pengsan kalau dengar dia nak buat fashion with that result -_-")

okay, this is not a FEW minutes. i've taken much of my studying time (ceh konon, padahal lepas ni check FB la twitter la blog orang lain la argh) so okay, i will try my best to remain away from this blogging thingy so that i can focus more on the upcoming exam. okay, these 2 are pictures of me and my classmates time nak masuk OT for orthopaedic case.

please don't expect me to become a surgeon even after seeing these pics of me pakai baju OT wahahaha. no way dol. but i would love to marry a surgeon hehe let's see if little dinosour wants to be a surgeon! so, do expect me to be a obstetrician/gynaecologist okay? prayers are much appreciated :D

okay, tadi marah2 now dah okay sket kan. tapi kalau igt balik msti nak marah balik. but unfortunately, we students can't do much. that person who promised to help pon hanya promise je. ah, dah biasa dengar orang ckp lebat konon hebat tapi semuanya just for his/her advantage, students jugak yang terkapai2. so, aku takkan termakan kata2 kau lagi ok? ehh, kan dah emo balik! ok, i'm signing off, NOW!

p/s : omg wait, the baju is far too big for my size hahahaha. but i think that was the smallest i cud find. lol. who cares anyway?

p/s : okay now rasa bersalah for swearing so much in this post. so tak sopan kan. LOL. but, tak nak delete. sebab, i really do think, someone, somewhere, deserves those words for making our life as students miserable. -_-"

please justify this

"find someone who loves you more than you love him"

too many people said so,
CARE TO EXPLAIN?
pls pls pls.

sesedap alam!

if you want to please me, get me a bar (or moreee!!) of cadbury crunchie. sumpah segala persengketaan kita langsai, zero-zero and i love u! because i have this unexplained obsession and passion for this chocolate since the past 12 years (or more?)

dulu zaman2 sekolah rendah, i used to go mengaji at this one tuition centre. oh yes, tuition centre youuuu, best sikit boleh kuar umah malam2 rather than panggil ustaz datang rumah mengaji dekat rumah depan mak bapak so tak best sbb takde member2 kan (astaghfirullahalazim, niat dah menyimpang jauh) tapi lepas tu memang my father did that, dia panggil ustaz datang rumah ajar kitorang mengaji, amek kau tak dpt lepak dengan member2 dah.

eh eh, tercerita pasal mengaji pulak. ha, the point is, everytime lepas mengaji dekat that tuition centre, adalah perkara wajib bagi i adalah untuk pergi kedai SS-eleven (bukan 7-11) untuk borong crunchie sebatang dua. jumlah pemborongan adalah berkadar terus dengan jumlah pengumpulan duit belanja pergi sekolah. sumpah tak tipu. bapak i tak cukup sporting utk bagi duit belanja pergi mengaji. haha banyak gedik aku la kan nak demand duit belanja pergi mengaji padahal before pergi dah dinner kat rumah balik pun supper dah tercongok atas meja, nak kene tempeleng ke demand duit belanja pegi mengaji?

i tak igt langsung who introduced me to this yummy chocolate bar tau2 i dah addicted to this choc since the past ermmm, 12 yearss???! damn! and bloody hell dulu this choc bar was only rm1.70 now it is rm3.60! rm1.70 was already expensive okay tatkala di zaman kanak2 dulu. just imagine belanja sehari adelah dalam rm1.50 the most pun rm2 time tu, lepas tu nak beli choc dah rm1.70, aku nak makan apa dekat sekolah? makan pasir? tapi demi cinta yg mendalam for this choc, i gagahkan jua kumpul duit just to indulge myself in this choc sesedap alam semesta!

time tu apek kedai SS-eleven tu dah tau dah kalau ada muka budak ni pakai tudung nampak jambul pakai spek bulat memang confirm nak borong crunchie, takde lain punya. lepas tu slow2 the harga increased, and taraf hidup kanak2 sekolah pun alhamdulillah meningkat selaras dengan kenaikan harga crunchie, maka duit belanja sekolah i pun di-upgrade sikit demi sedikit jadi dengan itu, still mampu borong crunchie everytime pergi mengaji. good thing!

and sampai lah dah habis sekolah, crunchie ttp dalam hati. haha. and org2 yg bebetul kenal me memang tau this is my fav choc ever maka dengan itu crunchie telah menjadi medium untuk memujuk, mem-bribe, mengorat dan sebagainya.

dan telah terbukti berkesan.


tunggu ape lagi? (kepada little dinosour)

She's gone to heaven so I've gotta be good.

Di syurga,
Aku akan minta,
Hanya kamu, dan kamu saja.

Kamu akan aku jadikan,
My favourite pet,
Aku akan cintasayangciumpelukgomol,
Sampai lebam.

Dan sekarang,
Let's not waste anymore time,
Aku mahu bilang,
Selamat tinggal selamat jalan.

Kita jumpa lagi,
Lepas mati nanti.

creepy girlfriend and nerdy boyfriend

I spent 2 hours stalking this guy thru the webcam. ahahaha. miss you so much babyyy! Why so nerdy? ahahaha, tak laahhh, he's on study leave, kena la jadi nerd kannn?




I have more snapshots of him studying, lap hingus sebab flu, buat muka retarded sebab stress study and muka steam sebab ngantuk. But I need not upload all the pics, 5 pics already make me look like a creepy girlfriend. LOL. I hate this guy because he is so jauh lepas tu gatal nak jugak couple jauh2 lepas tu tinggal girlfriend sorang2 dekat sini. Sigh. Nasib baik kau kacak! LDR sucks :( hmmm. miss you baby!

And here's the creepy girlfriend who woke up at 1.30 pm, bunked O&G theory test (purposely, I'll make up to that later I swear!!), haven't took her bath during the webcam-ing session (sekarang pun) and was trying hard to focus on studying but Saturday is just too precious to be wasted on heavy stuffs (dushhh! tumbuk muka sendiri!!)

kids don't lie

This is a story about a little girl, who used to tell the truth to everyone, and got punished by her mom for telling the truth. Yes, I'm talking about myself.

Situation 1

I was 9 years old. One day, I was absent from the class due to fever (kot?can't really recall but I really was sick) And the next day ;

Ustazah : kenapa awak tak datang semalam?
Me : saye tak sehat, ustazah.
Ustazah : mane MC?
Me : oh, saye takde MC sebab mak saya doctor, dia yang bagi ubat.
Ustazah : awak jangan nak bohong! (hoi ini dah start naik suara bagi satu kelas dengar yg dia nak ckp aku ni memang kaki penipu)
Me : betul la ustazah, mak saye doctor. die yg check saye sakit ape pastu die bagi ubat. bersungguh2 kan explain)
Ustazah : awak jangan nak buat cerita lah!
Me : (sedih)

And when I get home, I told mom what happened, hoping that she would be on my side! (duh, of course she will, I didn't do anything wrong!). And guess what she said ;

Mom : sape suroh ckp mak doctor???!! pepandai jeee (and membebel mcm ustazah dekat sekolah)
Me : (bengang, pahal nak marah lak kan? memang btol kot dia yg bagi ubat sume!)

Little did I know the fact that my mom stated that she was a housewife in the parents form for the school record. Sigh. Patutlah marah. I really dunno why she refused to state that she was working as a doctor instead. And patutlah the ustazah thought I was lying, my mom sendiri yg mengaku housewife in the borang. Tak pasal2 anak kena cop penipu.



Situation 2

It was Ramadhan. I was around ermmm, 7 years like that kot (argh can't recall) and as usual, tak puasa la kan. The most pun puasa half-day. And my mom was on "holiday" so she joined me for lunch and all la kan. And on the evening, I went out to the playground with the kids in my neighbourhood.

Noi : awak puasa takkk??
Me : takkk, awak??
Noi : eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, tak puasaaaa! kite puasa!
Me : alaaa takpe laa, mak kite tak puasa gak!
Noi : eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, mak awak pun tak puase?????
Me : a'ah.
Noi : eeeee, mane leh tak puasa, kalau tak puasa dapat dosa tauu. nape mak awak tak puase blablabla (tak igt)
Me : (I was annoyed that she said my mom berdosa sebab tak puasa!)

Maghrib was approaching and so I went back home. I told mom that my friend said 'mak berdosa sebab tak puasa' wahaha (how could I kan? but I was dead innocent I couldn't care less)

Mom : sape suro ckp mak tak puasa??? orang tak puasa ade la sebab diaaa!

and thanks mom for membebel-ing at me without telling me the exact reason why she didn't fast that day. I was left confused and upset (again, sebab kena marah for telling my friend the truth) I didn't know the reason until I was mature enough to understand things on my own. No wonder she was furious about it.

Little kids really do tell the truth, kan?

p/s : sorry mom, u're the victim of my honesty ;p

missing in action.

homaigod! been really busy rasa nak buat drama keling bunuh diri dekat train railway belakang rumah sebab stress. can u just imagine, i had to prepare for my study group in weekend, monday ada pharmacology seminar which is equivalent to our weekly (YES, WEEKLY mannn!) assessment, tuesday (tadi) got viva(oral test) on parasitology, tomorrow got pathology tutorial, lusa i got O&G practical test AND pathology tutorial, saturday i probably have O&G theory pulak. and to make everything worse, i have one clinical thesis to be done within 1 month and i dun even have the topic just yet! STRESSS!!!!!!

3rd internal assessment is just 1 month away. then ada 1 week gap je with the final. and the schedule telah dibuat oleh manusia2 yg igt those who are taking the exam are robots, bloody packed okay!

please please doakan all of us pass the exam dengan jayanya. so btw, i pon dah hilang point apa nak tulis about daily school vs boarding school. wahahahah, so i doubt i will continue writing about it, kalau ada pun, bila2 when i'm free kot, which is definitely not in the near future.

so now, i'm gonna crack myself thinking about what topic i should write for my clinical thesis! timing nak sucky kan, orang nak final, kau suro buat thesis, time aku free dulu2 tanak suro pulak (ahaha dasar budak last minute, kau bagi la kerja time bile pon, mesti aku bising ;p )

okay peeps, i might be away from blogging for quite some time kot. cey, rasenye la. need to focus on whats more important :( penatnya!

p/s : no more commed classesss yaww! guilt-free at last! hahahah