most of people my age are starting to enter the working life. the stressful but (maybe) rewarding working life. hey, we're an adult now! we make our own money, we no longer rely on our parents money (well at least i believe this applies to most of us, if not all)
our starting salary might not be a 5-digit number just yet. so you can't really declare urself a rich man when u just started working 2 months back though you only have urself to take care of (financially). but, do we remember our parents when we got our monthly payment?
i don't know what's the real situation is like for our generation as i have yet to enter the working life (am still struggling with my study years) and being away from my country, i rarely have the opportunity to discuss about working life with my dear friends in malaysia. so yeah, i hv very little idea about this anyway.
but i heard about people who get good monthly payment, but never bother to hand out some money to their parents. where did the money go? party, girlfriend(s), shopping, new phone, new ipad, new gadgets, new whatever, but never to parents who raised 'em up.
we really need to realize the importance. dude, it's not about money. it's not really about helping your parents financially especially if they still have a stable financial status. but it's about berkat.
truth is, our parents never really expect money from us. they raised us up dengan ikhlas dan sabar till we are able to stand on our own, and make our own money. so, tak rasa ke we need to balas jasa diorang? of course, balas jasa can be in any form, but when u're already in that state of having a stable financial income, don't u think giving out a little amount of money to ur parents is a perfect way to show your gratitude towards them?
like i said, maybe our starting salary isn't a really big amount. but it's not the amount that matters, it's the thought and keikhlasan that matters. bila bagi sedikit gaji u dekat ur parents, niatkan utk senangkan hidup dan hati mereka, untuk bahagiakan mereka, untuk balas jasa mereka, cukup dengan banyak mana yang u mampu. tak perlu banyak, coz pahala u bahagiakan ur parents bukan bergantung kepada berapa banyak duit u bagi ur parents.
u might think, "alaa..gaji aku bukan besar sgt, tak payah la bagi kat parents, dorg pun bukan tkde duit" so u might want to spend ur money to enjoy here and there, tapi Allah tu Maha Besar, once u ada terdetik rasa macam tu, besar kemungkinan duit yg u nk saving sangat untuk enjoy tu terpaksa u keluarkan untuk tujuan lain. u know, when God wants to show you something, it can come in any form. contohnye, u dah elok2 tak nak bagi duit dekat ur parents sebab nk saving, tibe2 plak kereta u buat hal, then u need to spend even more money on ur car. see? btw, this is a real life story told by someone :)) and as soon as it happened to him, he realized lah, ini sebab dia berkira sangat nak bagi duit dekat parents, so Allah nak tunjuk, he then have to spend more money on his car.
i've seen some very successful people, they didn't start of big, just enough amount of salary to start anew, but because they're consistent in giving out money to their parents, without being really calculative towards their own parents, they go on doing well in their life and job, u know, getting promoted easily, rezeki pun melimpah ruah, didn't it crossed ur mind that it's all because the berkat they got from doing this?
this is a reminder to us all. and especially for myself. i'm just another normal human being, tak terlepas dari sifat2 kurang baik jugak so when i already wrote this, hopefully i can remind myself better about the importance of this esp when i start working next year.
i can't wait to balas jasa my parents. though money won't be able to really pay 'em for what they went thru to raised me up, but well, that's the least i could do, and i would surely (hopefully) do more for 'em if i could.
oh yes, dun forget your little bro and sisters too. bila dah ada duit tu, belanja2 la jugak adik beradik yg lain. nak jadi lokek sgt pun takkan kemana nanti. maybe they dun appreciate it now, but as they get older, they'll remember what kind of a big sis/bro u are :)
money has never come easy for me. it's funny that most people often misunderstood me as a spoilt rich kid where hundreds of dollars fall easily from the sky and secretly got into my purse (omg I WISH!!) but hahahah so not okay. most of the time, i worked hard to save my own money. yeah u heard me right!
my parents never really pamper us with luxury. never ever. not a single one of us. both my parents came from a decent 'kampung' background so they knew exactly how hard life was back then and from their real life experience, they do appreciate the value of money more than most of the youngsters nowadays. and aware that money could easily spoil one's life, they decided to never pamper us with luxury.
me, on the other hand, was that girl who would only wear branded tops and jeans and bags and everything. let's just say, i was totally immature to think that my inner self confidence comes from wearing those branded stuffs. true. i was that kind of geli geli girl some years back. hahahaha. nah now i'm a mature girl who don't rely on those branded stuffs to boost up my confidence anymore. yeay :)
so what happened when i was still a school girl was, i saved my own money to get what i want. my parents won't get me a Levi's jeans as my birthday present, not even after i beg them to get me one with air mata darah sekali pun. in my dreams lah. and me, i was aiming for Esprit tops, ELLE sportswear, Guess handbags, Nike bags when i was really still a school girl
i would do just about anything to save money. ikat perut, some small little business (i can really go that far haha), did some cheating to daddy saying that the school requires us to pay for this and that (omg daddy i'm so sorry i will make up to this) and lots more. and taraaa, enough money for me to get what i want. with my own effort, no contribution from parents. been doing that since school.
not that my parents are stingy ke apa, but they just hate it when we wear expensive stuffs unnecessarily, so my dad cakap 'kalau kau nk baju raya abah beli, beli dekat jusco je, kalau nk beli yg mahal2 tu, kumpul duit sendiri' get what i mean? time tu saya sangatlah bajet tak suka nk pakai baju2 beli dekat jusco tu whahahaa *slaps forehead!!*
and the moment i accepted MARA scholarship to pursue medicine in India, right that moment jugak la terputus segala pergantungan duit daripada my parents. my parents know the fact that we got more than enough money for our expenses here and for that, he never really offer me money anymore. i totally stand on my own now.
i pay for own flight tix to go back home everytime, bought my own laptop, bought my own handphone, saved money like crazy for both my euro trips, and my ferrari in India ni pun my parents tak support langsung. i do get jealous la when i overheard my friends saying that their parents belanja this and that, offer this and that, belikan this and that this and that when i dun get the same privilege anymore.
truth is, i pernah throw tantrums jugak about this. ahahahaha. coz there was this one time, i get so jealous and feel so fucked-up, why the hell my frens still get that privilege from their parents when i have to stand totally on my own. i kinda complaint a bit to my mom and i end up being scolded afterwards. wahahahah mission failed.
i must know, tak semua orang cara hidupnya sama. my mom's family used to be family yg sangat susah, my granddaddy was just an army and he passed away quite early (before i was born) and their life gets even harder after his death. my dad pulak come from a very big family, 12 siblings, my granddaddy was just a clerk. and during his time studying in Glasgow, he even sent some money back home monthly (from his scholarship money) to help alleviate the family burden.
so yeah. truth to be told, my monthly allowance in India is quite a big amount. but it's all depends on how u control ur spending (gosh i'm terrible at this) but if my parents were to support me with some more money, i bet my spending would be worse. at least with what they're doing now, i can see where my money go - mostly on travelling and car.
though i still secretly wish to be pampered with luxury by my parents (which will never happen anyway), i'm grateful that they taught me to save my own money the hard way. i may not be the best example as someone with the best spending manner, but at least, i think i value money more than most people my age as i work hard to get what i want without depending on my parents :D
well i'm not a perfect friend to anyone either, not even a perfect girlfriend one can have. but the one thing that a best friend or a girlfriend/boyfriend should never do is to judge or comment on one's family when the bestfriend/partner actually trust you not to judge them.
it's not just annoying to have a bestfriend or boyfriend who judges your family like they have a better family, it kinda rip off the trust i have for that person too.
well, i don't trust people that easily, and when i do tell my problem to you, it simply means you're gaining my trust bit by bit. it's not simply complaining or seeking for advice from you when i tell you my problem, it's all about having someone to listen to you, it lifts up the burden off your chest just by having a person to listen to you without judging you or your family. don't worry if you don't have the solution of my problem, i don't usually expect that from you anyway.
i'm not gonna give you a real life example for you to be able to comprehend my point here, so here's what i can think of as an example :
siti : babe, sorry aku tak sempat siapkan notes study group kite, aku ade problem la...mak aku...
siti's bestfriend : nape ngan mak kau wei? kau ok tak? cite la...
siti : aku pun segan nk cite...hmmm...mak aku...tiap2 mlm kua pegi clubbing...balik2 pun bau
alcohol sume...so aku yg kene buat keje rumah sume..aku tkde mase nk blaja pun..nk
siapkan keje ni sume lg la tkde mase...
siti's bestfriend : OMFG!!! your mom went clubbing??? dah tua2 pun clubbing keee, mak kau
igt dia muda still bergetah eh?
get what i mean? siti told her bestfriend about her situation not with the hope that the bestfriend will come out with a solution for her and she doesn't even wanna hear her bestfriend commenting about how bad her mother is because deep down, she already know that very fact herself and she seriously doesn't need other people, especially an outsider (someone outside her family) to tell her that because no matter how bad her mother behaves, she's still her mother and deep down, no matter how much siti detest her mother for being an irresponsible mom, she still love her and no one can ever talk shit about her mother.
so yeah. same goes la when you cerita 'my little sister lari rumah last nite with her boyfriend', obviously the little sister is at fault for running away with her boyfriend but a bestfriend or boyfriend doesn't need to say 'ehhh bodohnya adik u pegi lari ngan boyfriend die, macam la boyfriend dia bole bagi die makan sedap2 lepas tu'. seeee. you don't fucking need to say that dude.
and you don't ever comment about other parents' way of upbringing. of course, the way my parents brought me up is different with the way your parents brought you up but it doesn't mean my daddy's wrong and ur daddy's right. they have their own reasons for bringing us up the way the wanted to.
i do admit my daddy is the most sporting daddy in the whole wide world, he didn't stop us from doing this and that, and i must say kami adik beradik takde la perfect mana tapi tkde la rosak macam budak yg sepah2 dekat KL tu like durrhh so when a boyfriend or bestfriend told me this 'i don't think ur father did the right thing to bring u guys up the way he did' omagashhh i'm likeeee 'hello who the hell are you to say that nak kene pelempang keeee abis adik beradik kau ape yg bagus sgt dari adik beradik aku haaa celakaaaaa' haaa memang rasa nak lempang smpai kau mampos.
so dear friends, kite semua manusia biasa tak perfect mana. just because u have a perfect family, semuanya baik2 belaka sembahyang cukup, puasa cukup, pakaian lengkap, puasa sunat lagi, it doesn't mean that you have the right to comment on other ppl's family. you just need to draw a line la wei between what u think and what u can actually zahirkan dengan kata-kata.
kalau bestfriend kau tu abang dia perogol, perlu ke kau kutuk2 abg dia dekat dia?
kalau boyfriend kau tu mak dia adalah pornstar, perlu ke kau hina2 mak dia dkt dia?
kalau girlfriend kau tu bapak dia penagih dadah, perlu ke kau caci maki bapak dia dkt dia?
look, some people memang baik dalam perlakuan dia, tapi when it comes to this, they fail so miserably. heh.
so this is my little Emily :) i am officially an auntie u knowwww. so eksaited! she's our new family member, my dad's fav girl skarang ni. habis la i, dah tak jadi daddy's fav girl dah sobsss :( ahahaha my dad hari2 emily this emily that. amboi abah, mentang2 cucu first, nnt aku dah beranak kang tah2 dia tak heran dah pun.
she has grey eyes. seriously adorable. and i seriously can't wait to go back home and gomol2 this little monster. teeheee. auntie misses u emilyyyy! :*
i'm alive :D teeheee. and tomorrow is our first day of Ramadhan here in Bangalore. Alhamdulillah we are still given the opportunity to celebrate Ramadhan :))
been busy with life, particularly with loved ones. not really busy studying :P gosh i can't imagine the kind of doc i'm gonna be in future. honestly, big part of my motivation to pursue medicine is gone (or hiding somewhere?) it's totally true when they say that medical students are initially highly motivated students, until they realize that they have too much to study/read/mug up. gosh. it's too much, almost unbearable so i just decided to finish this one up first. whether or not to pursue my all-time ambition (well, once upon a time, to be an obstetrician) i'll have to think over.
i decided go on hiatus from my blog for a really long time because i lost the drive to write (though the ideas to write keeps popping up in my brain), and i realized i was emotionally unstable that i could write things that i will end up regretting so the best thing i could do was to avoid writing at all. hehe. u know, i dun really go public when it comes to personal stuffs, especially when it is the bad things, the sadness, the whatever la.
but i'm fine now, but i dunno if i will still write on regular basis. i spend most of my time on the net twitting and tumblring coz somehow i'm allowed to express myself better thru those two social websites.
i'm going back for raya this year. hee. not excited bout celebrating raya in malaysia, but i'm excited about going back, and excited about my sister's upcoming reception. yeah, the one that has been pending since last year because finding the right date for the husband's family to come over all the way from cardiff is really a tough one. finally :)
anyway, i am now a final year medical student. glad. more than glad. but the workload (the amount of stuffs that need to be stuffed into my dear brain) is hmmm. yeah but that officially means i have just one more year to go. can't wait to get out from this bloody country. i sure cherish all the memories here, but gosh, i can't take it anymore that i need to get out asap :D
so di kesempatan ini, i wanna wish selamat menjalani ibadah puasa to all muslim all over the world :) see ya!