Thursday, October 21, 2010

Troubled Relationship

Have you watched Lagenda Budak Setan(LBS)? Don't worry I'm not here to make a boring review on this movie but I'd like to write about something that is very much related to this movie. It's okay if you haven't watched this movie, I'll make you watch a simpler version of what I'm trying to convey, or precisely, what I'm trying to make you see in this video clip. It's Love The Way You Lie by Eminem feat Rihanna. Proceed after you have watch either one of these.

So have you realize just yet the similarities that these two have? In LBS, Azmi was Ayu's psychotic ex-boyfriend who continued to stalk her and made her marry him unwillingly. He was portrayed as an alcoholic who beats his wife on regular basis and still claim that he loves her unconditionally.

Similarly, in Eminem's video clip, the couple was seen beating each other, probably cursing into each other's face before they started to kiss and make out and yes, the same cycle repeats.

The only difference in these two is that Ayu wanted to get away from Azmi after all that he did to her but in that video clip, beautiful Megan chose to stay in that troubled relationship though she did make few attempts to runaway from the troubled relationship.

So tell me, is it really love?

If it's not love, why do we see Azmi crying and mourning over Ayu's death by her grave at the end of the movie? And if it's not love, why does the beating-cursing-kissing-and-making-out cycle repeats itself in the video clip and the runaway attempt by Megan failed as the guy pulled her back into his arms?

Trust me, this doesn't only happen in movies, it happens in real life and it is really love. But some people just don't know how to show their love the right way. And ask me, why would you wanna stay in a troubled relationship? What good does it do to you?

Sometimes, a troubled relationship lasts longer than a smooth normal relationship. Because after all the troubles you've gone through, after all the beating and cursing, you still decide to stay with each other and it is a proof that the love is really strong that even the endless beating and cursing can't separate the two of you.

What actually hold you together? It's actually quite tricky to produce this in words but all I can say is, it's the combination of mutual interests, mutual understanding, sharing of some (or a lot) crazy thoughts and experiences together, and that qualities required for you to be able to call someone as your partner-in-crime is what makes you two stick together through thick and thin.

How can you not be beyond comfortable with someone who has all these mutual qualities with you? And as we know, comfort zone is a dangerous zone and at this point, you tend to lose respect, you tend to argue a lot but you'll laugh about it when you're done arguing. It's funny in the beginning but as time passes by, you'll get used to it and you'll be living a troubled relationship making that as your normal routine, just like the couple in that video clip.

But troubled relationship doesn't necessarily means it lacks of love because by the time the relationship gets all troubled, you have already fallen so deeply in love with the other half and that your life has already been all about that person. And so no matter how much it hurts when he curses you, no matter how deep is the wound when he beats you, you'll find a way to forgive and forget and the cycle repeats.

Superficially, it looks stupid. On the eyes of the audience, any couples that continue to love each other in a troubled relationship looks terribly stupid and dumb and blind and foolish. But they say, you'll judge only because you don't know what it feels like to be in that kind of situation. And I'd say, yes it's true because if you really know what it feels like to get stucked in that pathetic situation, you won't wanna judge anyone else ever again.

At the end of LBS movie, Azmi was seen shedding tears by Ayu's grave and that really prove that Azmi's love for Ayu truly exist and he didn't make her marry him just to prove that the best man wins. Though love is all over him, he failed miserably when it comes to showing his love for Ayu.

If the couple in a troubled distorted relationship has finally decided to go separate ways, it's usually harder to kill the love compared to normal smooth kind of relationship because obviously, the love between the two persons is tested far more greater in the troubled relationship as compared to the normal relationship. And hence the hard time that they have to face in moving on.

But true enough, once you lose respect, you'll slowly lose everything. In the end, a relationship needs more than just love as the ingredients for a functioning relationship. No matter how much you love the other person, if you fail to show it the right way, you lose.


hawe said...

haihh ira.always spot on la u ni.been reading ur blog for awhile now.nways ni belajar medic kt india ke jd love guru?haha!

IRA said...

hahah thanks for reading lol ;p tak tau la i mmg suke tulis bout love and guru la sgt..hahahah ;p

Anonymous said...

bestnye laki tue dpt megan stay or not to stay? fight or not to fight? to love or not to love? u fight ur love or just give in bcoz ppl told u?

p/s: "victim of premature idealogy"
p/s: its not a