Amalaynicans

I assume most of you reading my blog are malays. But, tell me, in which category of malays do you fall in?

a) the patriotic malays
b) the so-so malays
c) a'malay'nicans

First things first, credit goes to Obefiend for creating such a brilliant word the ancient people couldn't think of. That's just impressive.

I guess the categories of malays I've stated are self-explanatory. The patriotic malays are those malays who are proud to be one and will do anything to protect our social rights, culture, ones who are willing to preserve the old malay heritage and whatnots. Ah, you get what I mean, do I need to explain more?

I believe most of us fall in the second category. The so-so malays. We're proud to be malays but we hardly done anything for the benefit of malay community. Yes, I think I fall in this group, the kind of person who is proud to be a malay, but doesn't do anything that shows.

And hello hello, the number of a'malay'nicans are rapidly growing in our own beloved country. A'malay'nicans are those people who are purely of malay origin (a hint of Javanese/Bugis/Siamese/etc are common though) but they are literally ashamed to be a malay. Yes, the term A'malay'nican speaks for itself. It's the term used for those people who are so fond of the western, especially the Americans. Like you know, Americans this, Americans that, and boo boo, shame on you the Malays coz u're way behind the technology.

Oh tell you what, you deserve the boo boo so much more that the rest of the malay community. You're not welcomed in the western community, the only one being overly perasan is you. Not only that you have a prominent malay features on your face and body; you're tanned, your nose if dead flat, you have overly slanted eyes, your hair is black, you definitely score the minimum (or worse, below minimum) height in their standard height profile, and you can't even stand winter in their country, in fact, you still can't get rid of your oh-so-malay habits (bad habits included) like you know, the malays who constantly crave for nasi and only nasi everyday plus sambal paling pedas, the malays who are never punctual, the malays who will speak in thick regional dialect (like orang nogori, kelantan, sarawak etc) and still, you're too ashamed to admit you're one of the malays.

These a'malay'nicans will never want to buy stuffs from the local brands. According to them, ini barangan takde kualiti, we'd rather buy those from the western countries. Biar bayar lebih, janji berkualiti. Yes I admit some local brands are not of high quality, but it's unfair to make such judgement and such general statement. You never know how hard it is for the local businessmen to reach the top. And still you're so much influenced with the western brands to the extend of belittling the local brands from usahawan melayu sendiri. I would say, you're being plain stupid and shallow minded. Padahal every weekend kau pergi Giant jugak shopping barang rumah. Giant was born in Malaysia beb, tak malu ke pakai barang Giant?

It's a lie to say that I only buy stuffs from the local company, only those born in Malaysia, or to be specific, those products which are released by the malay entrepreneurs. I do, every now and then, buy imported stuffs. But being a mature human being, I have respects for the malay entrepreneurs who are struggling to compete, or worse, to even find a tiny place in the market, to show the world that we too can produce our own products. So, why bother comparing? And why some malays are being really mean to make such a statement saying that the local products/brands are of no quality etc etc. As if engkau bagus sangat, it's always better to work on something small, rather than talk big and produce nothing, just like most a'malay'nicans. Shame on you.

And what's so wrong and 'kampung' about listening to the local radio station? Yes, apparently, listening to malay songs will make you a 'kampung' girl/boy and if ever the a'malay'nicans know the fact that their close friends listen to these songs, they'll set a distance. Amalaynicans never wanna be friends with 'kampung' girls/boys, get it? They will only listen to English songs and would rather listen to silence than playing the malay songs. They'll go on bullshitting about the malay singers being off-standard, about how crappy the lyrics are, and how low the video-clips are.

And when you go for a karaoke day out with these a'malay'nicans, don't bother picking up malay/indon songs, they'll stare at you in horror. Seriously. Like you know, when they overheard the ppl from the next room sing a 'rock kapak' song, they'll go on "omg, don't they have a better song to sing? Don't tell me you nak nyanyi lagu melayu dekat siniiii, please no!" and stare at you for an assurance that you're one of the a'malay'nicans and not one of the patriotic malays who will sing malay songs when karaoke-ing.

Here's the thing, I do sing malay/indon songs when karaoke-ing and if that makes me 'kampung' then be it. And X-fresh FM is one of my favourite radio stations (because Era FM has too much advertisements for god's sake), oh yes, I do listen to malay songs when driving, how's that sound to you? I am definitely not qualified to be called a'malay'nicans, do I?

Funny thing is, they still listen to Too Phat, Disagree, Bunkface, Resh Monu or worse, they'll still listen to Siti Nurhaliza singing an english song (ade ke? aku bantai) Not so American eh?

These A'malay'nicans will go on laughing and rolling on the floor when reading the malay poetry or listening to a malay poet, reciting a malay poem with full enthusiasm. To them, they're making fun of themselves on stage. To them, the beauty of the malay poems are almost non-existence. The wordings are craps and cranky and the only purpose of malay poems is for them to die out of excessive laughing.

You know, they'll go on laughing listening to this line "Wajahmu indah bak bulan dan bintang"(okay, of course, I made this one up) and the only way to shut 'em up is by directly translating this verse into English and I bet you my heart, they'll adore the wordings. I know somehow, malay poems sound a bit corny and funny, but still, you're malay and you speak malay so could you at least respect that a bit? If you're so in love with English literature and detest Malay literature, you could just keep that to yourself, it's a courtesy for the malay poets and malay community. There's really no need to make an announcement of how crappy and sappy Malay literature are.

There are a lot more examples I wish I could share but this post is already too lengthy. To all the Amalaynicans, I hope this is a wake up call for you people. Being amalaynicans simply means you have no pride over yourself anymore because you're too busy worshiping everything Americans and everything western till you forget your root and your own culture. It's okay to adore/follow the western here and there but it is definitely not okay to ditch completely the eastern part of yourselves, and worse, it's definitely not okay to belittle or downgrade everything that is malay because that makes you 'orang yang lupa diri'.

Remember this line "TAKKAN MELAYU HILANG DI DUNIA" ? Well, if more and more people are becoming Amalaynicans, eventually, there will be no more malays in this world.

p/s : those mat salleh/minah salleh yang u adore sangat tu, will secretly laugh at you and think u're stupid for downgrading your own asal usul. shame on you.