my school mag is cooler than urs!

ahahah seriously! was flipping thru these old pages of my school mag today :) yup if u're wondering, i brought along my cool school mag to india! other school mags can't be any cooler than mine, wahahaha sorry i was born with this prominent trait of 'perasan' and further acquired this trait in this school :D girl school rocks!

here are some of my favourite pages. be prepared with the fact that my face is anywhere and everywhere in that mag. don't u get my point?! lalalalala~~

my very own page. click to enlarge.
pardon my 'poyoness'. hey, school girl is supposed to be 'poyo' heee ;p

some stickers of us

my dearly missed bed-mate!

nad, she actually got that nickname - superstar.
"kak nad superstar" remember?

farah and her craps about a newly discovered princess. blueks ;p

random pics in the hostel. i love :)

we do have a gothic babe in school! my very own dormmate!

she rocks a.k.a syiro!

i wud say this is the most creative page by erna! click to enlarge!

oh muz dear! whatever she wrote is just so true!

the gangsta.

envy us! am sure u don't have this in ur school back then! hahaha

this is hilarious. note every character is this so-called
"ada apa dengan aenn?"
-those pics really speak for itself :) -

botol ayer = handphone
reban = warden

click to see naz's description about me! hahahaha

and this quiet girl pulls out some jokes on her page.
i likeeee!

are we born with this 'trait'? hahaahahaha. i miss us :D

my husband and kids hoho

nak sambung pasal berangan. please don't bother to read kalau macam tak larat nak baca fantasi-fantasi i okay. of course, studying is better than reading my blog :)

my kids! wait, speaking about kids, i just had a class of mechanism of labor earlier this day! weh nak beranak bukan senang dowww! ingat teran nak beranak sama macam teran nak berak ke? memang tak ah weh! hari tu pun i saje2 pegi labor room lepas tu tercongok kat situ buat muke kental tak tahu malu sebab nk tunggu jugak orang beranak! and berkat muka tak malu i dengan baz, kitorang dapat tengok 1 normal delivery hari tu. normal tak normal, sakit tetap sakit. lepas baby dah kuar, kena plak tunggu placenta (uri2) tu keluar, mane boleh main tarik2 je placenta tu macam main tarik tali. lepas tu, damage dekat sekitar vagina tu boleh nampak dengan sangat jelas okay. hey i bukan nak cerita obscene ke apa tapi ni knowledge yang i think i should share with u people especially those of u yang have no idea about delivery. i sebagai perempuan rasa macam omggggg takut gila kot sebab macam lepas delivery tu vagina tu macam rabak je? ye, rabak. lepas tu the respective doctor kena jahit balik dekat vagina tu. shit serious macam jahit kain, macam dulu2 i jahit kain untuk buat batu seremban. weh kalau i jahit vagina orang tu macam jahit batu seremban tertutup la balik semua semua kan? whahaha wtf. ini inner joke. sapa yang paham diam2 sudah sapa tak paham, abaikan inner joke ini.

walaupun bukan i yang beranak, tapi tengok orang tu beranak tibe2 macam my pain receptor got stimulated so tibe2 rasa macam wahh takutnye nak beranak and tibe2 macam terus teringat mummy kat rumah! serious korang kena sayang mummy ibu amma emak mama ummi korang sampai mati hidup semula pun kena sayang gila2 jugak sebab diorang sanggup susah payah lahirkan korang. ha, tu tazkirah hari ni (hey, i pun reti bagi tazkirah okay, jgn pandang rendah dkt i okay!)

okay that's about it. doakan i jadi obstetrician okay? :) okay back to topic, my kids! or my future kids, to be precise. i nak 3 anak paling kurang, kalau terlebih tu rezeki la kan tapi kalau boleh tanak la ramai sangat nanti nak naik mpv pun tak muat takkan nk kena beli lori atau bus kot? lagipun mane boleh lawan cita2 denin yang nak 9 orang anak. nanti denin marah. tak boleh tak boleh.

ha my kids ni kan, dari kecik i nak ajar diorang art. er, tak, bukan i la yang ajar i reti ape tah psl art. i meant to say, i nak hantar diorang pegi blajar art. tak kesah la music ke, painting ke, dance ke, acting ke, poetry ke (mana tau i lahirkan usman awang jr ;p) whatever janji art. why? sebab i rasa art plays a big role in our life. i tak kata la kalau tak buta seni nnti pendek umur ke apa, tapi to me, seni ni boleh buat hidup seseorang tu lagi fun, bermakna, relax, dapat express apa yang tak terexpress through other things etc etc. to put it in simple words, seni ni maybe bukan satu keperluan, tapi seni dapat lengkapkan life seseorang. and kenapa nak hantar dari kecik? sebab kau tak boleh belajar seni dalam masa yang singkat. right? macam i, i sangat suka music, dance and acting to be frank. tapi i tak dapat good exposure on these things. as far as i remember, i start dance and acting since sekolah rendah, itu pun through kelab-kelab kebudayaan. so korang pun tau la kan, setakat kelab kebudayaan kat sekolah tu, kena la tunggu hari guru atau hari sukan atau sambutan hari raya untuk buat persembahan2 tu semua kan. so walaupun i start dari sekolah rendah, i still rasa tak cukup. and music, i love music for god's sake! tapi exposure i kepada music lagi lah lambat kecuali recorder, tapi i tak suke recorder. i paling suke guitar, tapi itu tu i start take up guitar class masa form 3, tak lama lepas tu dah kena pergi boarding school, lepas tu on and off je main guitar. so rasenye, kalau i dapat early exposure, mungkin tak macam ni. so that explains why.

next, i nak diorang join debate. i so love debate. nak jadi debater, confidence mesti mau mantap. and confidence tu sangat penting kot dalam hidup. kalau tahap confidence tinggi, u'll shine so bright no matter what. tapi kalau tahap confidence samar2, orang pun nampak kau samar2 la kan. and as a mom (cewah cewah), i mesti la nak my kids semua confident2 belaka kan! ha maka demi usaha menanam keyakinan yang tinggi pada anak2, i akan cube buat diorang suka debate and make them join the debate.

i nk jadi mummy yang sporting tapi tegas dengan my kids. i nak jadi mummy yang tolong make-upkan anak dia untuk school prom, and juga mummy yang marah anak dia kalau anak dia buat salah. ehh, time ni dah tua sangat kannn? ahahaha kenapa terus terberangan bila anak dah besar? tak tak, masa anak i kecik2 lagi, kalau yg boy i nak rambut die panjang sket lepas tu ada ekor kat rambut dia! waaa mesti macho hensem bergaya! kalau yang girl i nak belikan colorful accessories for her so that i leh buat tocang for her, boleh ikat rambut 2, boleh buat sanggul (erk that's too old for a kid hahah) and macam2. wah comelnye babybaby i!

eh dah la, cukup berangan tuk malam ni. weh lately i banyak cakap mengarut2 kan. hey biarlah, blog memang tempat untuk mengarut pun kan! yes esok saturday takde class! okay la i need my beauty sleep, mau tido sampai tengahari, takpe kan? ala takpe tido sampai tengahari sementara takde laki and anak2. wahahaha. dah ah ira, kau ni mengarut tak sudah! okay nite2~!

saya ada masalah peribadi

sekarang jam waktu tempatan bangalore menunjukkan 2.30 pagi tepat setepat-tepatnya. ini agak depresi sebab tak dapat tidur lagi. shoot la nape i tak tido lagi.

i dah golek2 since pukul 1 pagi tepat. still awake though. nampaknye esok i bakal tertinggal bus pegi hospital lagi. terpaksa spend beberapa rupees naik auto pegi hospital. kau ingat naik auto murah ke? walaupun hodoh terasa macam naik lembu pegi hospital tapi auto dekat bangalore tetap mahal.

tapi bus to baptist hospital gerak at 7.30 am (according to new bus schedule tu la) hah 7.30 am memang tak la. 7.30 am - highest probability is i tengah mandi or kalau awal sikit maybe tengah depan cermin buang taik mata.

oleh yang demikian, apa kata i decide sekarang - esok pegi naik auto je lah! tak payah aku nak berkejar2 mandi siap2 pastu terkedek2 lari dekat bus yang dah start jalan. ah malas.

i think i need someone to tell me bed time stories, yes, every night!

jom kite main kawin2.

malam ni rasa agak relax la maybe sebab tkde assignments yang perlu disiapkan. seronok. tibe-tibe rase mcm esok hari sabtu plak kan, relax satu macam. ceyh agak2 la kan sabtu. pdhal esok baru jumaat. pagi ada clinical O&G smpai tengahari. tu dah cukup kasi pusing kepale i okay! petang jumaat i lagi depresi sebab ade class teori clinical subjects, 4 subjects stret amek kau! 2 subjects terakhir memang i akan termenung pandang doctor tu bersyarah berhujah menumpahkan segala ilmu-ilmu di dada beliau sambil er - sambil termenung je. hey, that's better than tido tersengguk2 right? (ha ni pasti ade yang terasa wahahahahahahahahahaha)

tiba-tiba (ceh, semua pun tiba-tiba kan, tipu betul!) mood malam ni rasa macam nak berangan. ahaha tak! padahal i berangan tiap2 malam cume malam ni je rase nk write it all out kan. bukan berangan benda bukan2 astaghfirullahalazimmmm! ni berangan pasal future yang still full of mystery. ceh macam misteri nusantara pulak kan.

lately bila bukak facebook, gmbar kawan i kawin bersepah2. pergh. adekah sekarang ni memang trend kawin awal? atau sebenarnye tkde la awal pun tapi i je rasa diorang kawin awal sebab i ni yang kawin lambat? er? ade a friend of mine, same age, siap letak gmbar ultrasound her very own unborn baby in facebook! wah, gile lah padahal dulu sama2 ponteng sekolah lepas tu berfoya-foya dekat sunway pyramid dengan pakai baju sukan sekolah and track suit serious comot tapi tak kire jugak sebab time tu rase jadi nakal and comot adalah perkara paling cool dalam alam semesta. yes it was. hahaha. and now she's becoming a mother!

okay, i still belajar. baru 2nd year for god's sakeeee 2nd year baruuuuu! most of my friends are in their final year now, in fact ramai jugak yang dah start keje and ade yang dah berkira2 nak sambung master wtf wtf. i jangankan master, nak dapat degree pun lg 4 tahun paling kurang.

okay sebenarnye nak berangan kan, tiba2 plak terkenang nasib, apekah! hahahaa. okay everybody has a thing about wedding right! me too! tak salah berangan walaupun berangan lebih2 melampau2 kononnye kau bakal kawin dengan donald trump yang kaya raya tu kan. name pun berangan, sedangkan mat jenin boleh berangan atas pokok, ape lagi ira yang tengah golek2 atas katil. yes jom join i berangan.

wedding - once in a lifetime. unless kau dah pasang niat nak kawin 4-5 kali tu memang murni gile lah niat kau kan. erk note that i may sound materialistic wahahaha but wtf girls are all like that kalau tak maybe kau bukan perempuan sejati kot ahahaa. dulu2 (in fact sampai sekarang) i rase kawin ni best sebab dapat pakai baju kawin yang cantik. okay kesian husband i kan rasa terbiar sebab i lagi pentingkan baju kawin daripada die hahaha sorry darling ;p u know u love me kan, eh, u know i love u! so i rase la kan, i will get excited the most bile nak pilih my wedding gown! i pasti akan pilih wedding gown yang paling cun melecun menawan kalbu yang bile dah pakai rase tanak cabut smpai rase nk tido dengan wedding gown tu! tapi kite orang melayu kan, mane ade pakai gown2 ni kan mase kawin. sigh. standard baju kawin melayu mesti ala2 baju kebaya kain songket camtu kan tapi cun jugak cume just rase nak jugak pakai wedding gown yg kembang2 macam cinderella tu! bole la bole la bole laaaaaaaaaa!

next, mcm biase la, photographer mesti mau yg mantap. setakat pakai camera 7.1 mega pixel tanak ah weiiii. kate nak buat album kawin kan, ha, i nak pakai macam2 jenis baju kawin untuk photoshoot. tak kire la baju kawin orang jawa ke, korea ke cina ke africa ke kadazan ke penan ke jakun ke, tak kesah, semua nak! nak buat album kawin yang tebal besar tu nnti dah kawin boleh bawak album satu gabak tu suro sedara mara tengok time kite melawat diorang. wahahahaa. suro! and gmbar kawin sume tanak la posing control cun atau handsome sebab kite tak perlu nak control2 semua ni kan sebab we're born with it so ape kate kite pose rock2 sket baru arr macam rockstar kawin kan! ha! itu memang stylo!

lepas tu honeymoon. ha, ni banyak pakai duit ni tapi tak kire, i'll leave it to u honey :) hahahahahaha honeymoon part 1 mesti la bora-bora island tak kire tak kire nak pegi jugak kalau tak i mogok tanak masak tanak pegi keje tanak buat pape langsung ha padan muke hahahah memang takde sape nak kawin ngan aku la kan kalau buat perangai camni ;p tapi bora-bora is so irresistable u mesti nak bawak i pegi sane kan sayang kan kan kan! i know u will ;p ;p ;p okay, tu part 1. lepas dah sengkek and makan nasik dengan kicap selama sebulan (dan dan sebulan je kan), kite plan our honeymoon part 2, part 3, part 4 dan seterusnye, k sayang k? please jangan bawak i honeymoon dekat port dickson atau genting highland. i dah pegi berjuta kali so kalau u surprise i la konon for our honeymoon sekali tengok2 dekat port dickson memang i merajuk 10 tahun okay!

i rase my entry dah cukup panjang kot ala tapi tak cerita lagi pasal me and my kids! that's the best part of it kot wahahaha belum pape dah ade sifat keibuan nih ha i rase i memang calon ibu yang baik nie! pergh ni kalau anak i bace balik ape yg mummy die tulis mesti die cam ya rabbi camni ke mak aku dulu2 ahahaha dah dah, esok malam i sambung psl me and my kids okay! :D :D :D

wake me up when september ends.

i gotta say this out loud : -

I THINK U'RE STILL LIVING IN YOUR PAST GLORY!

kesian gila. how do i wake u up without making u whine in fear of facing ur ever-so-gloomy era?

now i feel like laughing out loud. HAHAAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA.

i just think u're simply pathetic.

hide and seek

2nd post of the day, hahaha wtf. it's already late! nope i'm not skipping tomorrow's class no wayyyyy! (ceh bunyi macam student yg tak nak ketinggalan lecture kan pdhal risau attendance yg dah mcm telur di hujung tanduk wtf wtf)

okay seriously, i think i need to find myself! yes i'm talking about ira! she's lost somewhere helpppp!!! due so some overrated external and internal pressure ( ye kawan2, pressure terbahagi kepada 2 iaitu luaran dan juga dalaman) some bad bad bad influence, own silly silly thoughts etcetera etcetera, ira is now - a rockstar. haha tak tak. ira is now - a - a - ape haaa? tah.

okay this is craps u can stop reading now, yes please.

i dunno how to describe. i just feel different. i think i do think differently now. i see things differently, i react differently, i speak differently, i do everything differently which is - depressing! i find myself becoming more and more complicated ( i said more and more, i didn't mean i was a simple person before - at least not in the recent past) , apparently i am becoming harsh to people ( no i was nothing like that before cecey) and i make terrible decisions - i mean, really terrible!

simple is boring. but being complicated, i can't seem to handle myself and the situation well. not that i wanna be one, but i accidentally lead my life this way. sounds sucky but whatever, it does. and yes yes i can't afford to stay patient urut2 dada tahan sabar atau sumpah seranah bergelen2 dalam hati sebab tanak terlepas la kan, guess what, to hell with that! whatever ppl's past and current perception on me, good or bad, i suggest u to forget about it now because i'm still in this unstable phase and i might change from good to bad or maybe from bad to good (if only) anytime from now so yek, tak perlu any judgement daripada siapa2 yang tah kenal aku tah tidak.

the most hated part - decisions! omg benci! i am a terrible decision maker and therefore, i will not decide anything anything anything at all! u wish okay! and so i will just go wherever the wind takes me.

told ya to stop reading because these are all craps. and yet u're still reading. wahaha. kau memang takde keje kan.

where's ira lalalala?

- she's playing hide and seek. mari kita cari. eh, siapa tanak cari sudah.

sampah masyarakat

dengar sini,
aku sentap sikit la kan,
kau nak berlagak dengan apa yg kau ada atau lagi tepat kalau aku cakap pernah ada tapi lepas tu tak kemana pun because u're still there,
and then nak belittle orang sebab kau rasa kau hebat macho superb fastastik bombastik ape kejadah kan,

aku nak tanye la kan,
kau tak rase malu ke?
kalau kau rasa kau hebat, tak takut ke one day yg kat atas tu tarik balik semua dari kau sebab kau berlagak mcm haram?
or kalau kau rasa kau hebat gile, kau tak rase ke sebenarnye ada berjuta2 orang lagi hebat dari kau?
kalau kau rasa kau seronok sangat nak belittle others,
aku rasa tak lama lagi kau akan rasa lagi teruk dari tu.

so aku rase la kan,
baik kau ready je la mentally and physically,
aku tanak la doa kan buruk utk lu bro,
tapi aku rasa ni bukan first time kau suke suke hati pandang rendah kat orang,
pandai2 pikir la kan,
aku rasa otak kau takde la sampah sangat kan untuk fikir common sense,
so bro, enjoy la hari2 hebat zaman kegemilangan kau sementara masih ada,
sebab lepas ni tak mustahil orang2 yg kau hina yg kau rasa sampah sangat tu buat the same thing dekat kau.

note to a specific someone : kitorang sume tau la history lu bro! tak payah nak kecah2 bajet hebat superstar kejadah, kang aku bukak cerita kau jugak yg malu!

p/s : i'm saying this for the 2nd time, don't boast around with what u have, they're not purely yours anyway! :)