jadi, awaklah superhuman itu?

just a normal human being,

tapi bongkak bila berkata-kata,

kau fikir,

kau superhuman with superpower?

it's okay,

mari menanti yang pasti,

satu hari nanti.

specialty

mencuba dan terus cuba is my specialty,

mencuba dalam sedih sakit hati marah sentap serabut is also my specialty,

watching people trying but do nothing 'bout it could be yours.

my little escape

spent a little time with myself at a place that provide me complete serenity today :) i won't tell you the place but you can imagine a serene hideout like the rooftop, beach, cool hill, yeap something like that :))

it's like a habit. wherever i go, i will have that little hideout place where i can go to whenever i feel down or angry or anything. this is me since forever. there was this one time, me and my family went to PD (we never go to fancy island or anything, my parents are certainly not into travelling like me - at least not for my mom) and i was "missing" to a little hideout place -somewhere along the beach je but a little secluded area, just relaxing and thinking- and my dad got really worried he thought i was really missing and marah me like crazy when i got back to our villa :/

back in my home, i always have our little pond area that sometimes i duduk tepi kolam celup kaki just thinking and thinking. if i want an escape yang jauh sikit, i always go to this one condo and lepak at the rooftop overlooking shah alam nice view :) dulu, there's this one bukit i used to go jugak, but now no more sebab ade construction rumah and all (ntah2 dah siap pun rumah dekat situ)

most of the time when i do this, my aim is to gain peace. at this hideout place, i can cry, i can marah, sometimes i write or listen to music and most of the time just blankly stare at the view with heavy monologues inside my head!

if i can make a movie of out this, it's gonna be an awesome one okayy *imagine myself sitting by the beach, tgh termenung, and then ade suara (kononnye suara dalam hati) -i'm not getting married with this guy- -you are getting married with him because this is ur parents' wish- -but i don't love him- -so you don't love your parents?- -but this is about my future- -but your parents are everything-* hahahahahahahha OKAYYYY DRAMA MELAYU TAPI CAKAP ENGLISH.

siapa yang tak pernah buat mcm ni, mesti korang tak pernah tengok movie feeling2 kan or simply takde feeling tengok cerita2 camni :P as far as i know, very few people have similar habit as i am yang will prefer to spend time with myself whenever i feel like it.

i enjoy going shopping alone too, and if i have to i will have my meal alone at the shopping mall, yes it happened many times and i find it normal but people will go, whyyyy ira why you pegi makan sorang2! hahahaha dah i pegi shopping sorang, takkan tetibe i nak call people up just to teman i makan. my own personal record was shopping from morning till night with high heels, having both lunch and dinner alone with snacks in between at mid valley some time back, and i went back home feeling REFRESHED :)

now, i'm going to prioritize my life. i want to concentrate on my studies as my finals is only in 4 months time :D so, yeah. i'll be over this soon! wish me luck!

uh oh before that, i would like to quote my sister as i find this very deep and meaningful. may help some of you too :)

"as long my hubs ,my father and my sibs kenal siapa i and terima i seadanya,i dont need to justify myself to anyone...bukan org2 nie pernah tanya kabar or ambil kisah pun ... :)))"

Grateful

I can't thank you enough for all the wonderful people you gave me.

Thank you, Allah :)

Belly Piercing

if u're a regular reader of my blog u'll know i'm a fan of piercing pleasure ahahaha. got myself more than 1 piercing on each ear but now i dah tak pakai subang banyak2 sebab umur dah 25 so i really have to act my age already :P plus the 3rd piercing onwards dah pun tertutup so if i nk buat perangai muda mudi pun i can only wear up to 2 earrings each ear.

anyway, i wanted to do belly piercing since soooooo long before but never really have the guts to do so coz i used to have a close friend who got the belly stud literally sunken in her belly, quite a significant complication -____-" so ever since that happened i macam cuak jugak nak pierce my belly.

until recently!!! :P

yes i got my belly pierced about 3 months ago i think :D why? how? where? hahahahhaha it was an impulsive act jugak lahhh. i googled about having a belly piercing in bangalore but i wasn't really sure about doing it until i had a silly billy argument with my boyfriend which makes me feel a bit rebellious (eleh konon sangat) so getting it done was no longer an option that particular moment. ahahahhaa.

funny part is, he was in the middle of his exam when it happened, so we had an argument and dia pun takde mase nk pujuk i, i pun malas nk tunggu die pujuk i so i macam 'eeee malas nk fikir baik aku tindik pusat jekkkk' so without further delay i went straight to Jayanagar (pergh jauh ok tempat ni) right after my class that evening untuk mengejar mimpi dan cita2 i ahahahaha.

melilau2 jugak carik the tattoo/piercing place ni and when i finally found that place turns out they don't have belly studs. hek elehhh! padahal on the phone they said they do have belly studs, eeee memang bengang gila time tu dah la i traveled quite far to get it done sekali they don't have the belly studs. memang mengundang kemarahan betul.

they offered to pierce my belly using the eyebrow studs. memang kepalahotakmu sangat la kan. belly studs are curved studs while eyebrow studs are straight studs so they really are not convertible as claimed by the shop owner. kalau la i memang tetibe caught up in the moment nak jugak buat perangai nk pierce pakai eyebrow studs, mau menggagau kesakitan coz straight stud, when pierced into ur belly, will definitely make ur skin stretch more than it should. sakit woahhh.

lucky me, the tattooist was really nice. while the person who was supposed to do the piercing was away, he talked to me saying that it's really not a good idea to go on piercing my belly with the eyebrow stud and he suggested another place in commercial street. and as we know, commercial street sangat lah packed so telling exactly where the shop is really not that easy and he actually offered himself to accompany me to that very place. my luck baby my luck.

i agreed and he brought me to that place. btw orang yang nak pierce tu kemain bengang jgk dengan the tattooist actually sebab kire macam the tattooist makes him lost his customer, but anyway, if it wasn't because of the tattooist pun i don't think i wanna go on with the piercing there.

reached the piercing centre in commercial street, it's actually more like a salon. and yes, they do have lots of belly studs there so i chose the belly stud first before getting my piercing. i was over-excited okayyyy coz i finally get to tick off one of my 'things i must do before i die' list :)

the needle used was sterilized (yea being a medical student, u will be extra cautious bout this) and she did not give any anaesthetic. i actually thought i'll be getting some anaesthetic first before she go on pricking my belly but nope, she literally poke my belly with the big needle hahahha and needless to say, it wasn't painful when it happened. but it was painful when she sprayed some alcohol or something, also for sterilization purpose. pedih ok, but my excitement was so much more than the pain itself.

taking care of the belly piercing wasn't that easy. ingatkan the scariest part is to pierce, but taking care of the piercing was worse. hahahaha. for the first few days i had to put antibiotic ointment around the piercing as prophylaxis (so that i won't catch infection at the surrounding area) and bahana kau terlanggar piercing tuuu...pergh sakit nk mati time tu sampai rase 'damn kenape aku pegi tindik pusat!'

there was this one time i was walking from the car park to the hospital, holding the big SRB Surgery text book sambil time tu tengah raba2 nak capai my phone coz it was ringing and pappp, the text book slides from my hand and fell onto my belly. pedepergghhh rasa macam kena tikam, sakit siotttt.

it took about 3 weeks gak for the pain to really go away, meanwhile i kena jaga takleh terlanggar (but trust me i lost count bape banyak kali i terlanggar the piercing) and thank god, now no more pain!! hahahaha but kekadang tu ade la jgk sakit tapi not like awal2 dulu lah.

and forgot to mention, at earlier stage my skin jadi hyperpigmented surrounding the piercing area, which is hodoh but now my skin is back to its color, i guess time tu dengan tgh inflammed nye dengan i asik terlanggar nye jadi hyperpigmented kot.

so if you ask me, do i regret doing this? nope! this is what i've been wanting to do since years ago and i don't regret doing this! ahahaha i don't have a proper picture of my belly piercing, gmbar yang ada semua gambar vain sendiri2 so tak kosser la nk upload gmbar vain ahahahaha. i basically did this belly piercing for my own self satisfaction rather than nk tunjuk orang sangat, that's why tkde lagi gmbar my belly piercing :P will post it up if ade nanti!

so girlies, if you rase nak buat belly piercing but takut of the complications, i'd say, with proper care, there's really nothing to worry about, you should really go for it. it makes you feel awesome! :P even if you're not the type who wears crop tops to show off your belly part, you can still feel good about it even if you don't show it to others kan! hihi it's really not about showing off to people, it's about what u've been wanting to do and the feeling i get after doing it!

so yeah, go for it :) and i'm open to answer any questions regarding this! hikss <3

till then, daaa :)

i am born gedik and i really can't help it zzz

ahahahaha believe it or not, wherever i go, daripada zaman lower form and then i went to boarding school in upper form, smpai college and uni life, people always call me gedik and if you ask me, i am not at all offended with people calling me gedik. biarlah, aku gedik gila pun aku tak dengki dengan kau kan.

sometimes i ask my close friends jugak,

"kenape korang panggil aku gedik dowh?"

"aku gedik sgt ke?"

"buat mcm tu pun kire gedik ke?"

and the replies that i got are somewhat the same, like dis,

"dah sejak bile pulak kau tak gedik?"

"gedik is ur trait so live with it"

"and u ask ppl why we call u gedik? iraaa?"

hahahahahhaa. so paham tak? gedik is ira, ira is gedik, paham tak how gedik is strongly adherent strongly associated strongly assimilated (motif gune ayat ala scientific? nk bgtau aku medical student) in me. paham tak i didn't try to be gedik ala2 lemah lembut lemah gemalai or manja2 cam anak kuning tu ke, i am just being myself. and if being myself makes people call me gedik then be it. kenape nak sakit hati sgt?

"dah orang panggil kau gedik, pesal kau tanak change?"

hek eleh pesal aku nk ubah diri aku just because people call me gedik. aku gedik pun aku ade dengki dengan kau? aku gedik pun aku ade menggedik ngan boyfriend kau? aku gedik pun aku ade buat palat dengan kau? aku gedik pun aku ade menyusahkan hidup kau? takde kan takde kannn??

kalau dah sakit mata sangat tengok aku terkinja2 gedik, tak payah la su

sah2 pandang muke aku kalau aku ade seblah kau, tak payah susah2 stalk aku dekat facebook atau twitter and paling penting, tak payah susah2 nk jaja cerita kata aku gedik bagai dekat kawan2 kau yang sebenarnye lebih kurang je gedik ngan aku. get it get it?

and please, tak payah perasan claim korang kenal aku sangat2 kalau korang tak knal aku personally. personally here means kau memang kenal aku as in rapat dengan aku, boleh borak slambe2 dengan aku and bole buat lawak bangang dengan aku.

setakat borak tanye ''dulu you sekolah mane?" lepas tu tegur hi kat aku 2-3 kali kau ingat kau knal aku personally ke? memang tak. lepas tu nak cakap ''aku mmg kenal sangat ira tu, perangai memang macam sampah'' ewah ewah. sampah masyarakat sangat kau ni kalau borak asik nak menyampahkan orang, abis perangai kau habis mulia eh?

memang la on the surface aku ni nampak gedik, superficial, materialistic plak tu, perangai diva pun ade jugak kadang2, ade jgk orang panggil aku drama queen wahahaha tapi itu ape yang korang nampak dari luaran. kalau kau tak pernah susah senang dengan aku, tak pernah tgk my kind of friendship or relationship, tak pernah tengok how i am with my family, clearly u dunno my hati budi so u're clearly not in the position to judge me.

tapi tkpelah, aku sebenarnya dah habis lali with people hating me. it happens everywhere i go and aku pun tak pnah mintak semua orang suke aku. i mean, i am well aware that u can't make everybody like you, coz you can't afford to impress everybody pun. kau nk benci aku? benci lah. if u're a nobody to me, i seriously don't care if u hate me. cume yang aku akan kesah kalau kau cari pasal dengan aku sebab if you think i'm just gonna sit still when orang buat palat dengan aku, u're really wrong.

so pokoknye, aku tak kesah korang nk panggil aku gedik ahahahha tapi kalau kau rase aku tak pnah susahkan hidup kau or dengki dengan kau, tk payah la susah2 nak mess with mine jgk. it's really tiring. dah besar kot, aku pun dh 25, ingat aku hadap lagi ke nk buat perangai saiko gaduh ala2 high school? haa. nk korek himpunan kisah2 saiko aku gaduh time sekolah2 dulu memang belambak2 hahah tapi tu semua time aku tak matang so skarang aku dah matang, i'm sure u guys are too, unless you are mentally sick yang hunger for more n more drama to spice up ur life -___-"

signing off now.

gimme some peace of mind dudeeee!

girly times with close friends :D

this blog is too full of writings coz i'm too lazy to upload pics. alahaiii i malas nk upload pics bagai sebab bukannye *cough* fashionista *cough* sangat!

anyway, tkyah nk konon fashionista sangat, i orang kebanyakan jek baju pun ade xde je brand, muke pun tkde nk make-up sangat, jalan pun tkde nk cam model sangat tapi who cares, dis time tahan je tgk aku upload pics byk2 eh.

less words, more pics :) daaa.